I’ve had a lot of people ask me why I purposefully omit their names in my blog. I like to tell stories of my travel, but I will never mention someone’s name and I will rarely include pictures of them (unless I don’t have any other usable pictures). Most people aren’t upset, they’re just curious.
Why omit names? There are two main reasons.
1. As of last month, more of my blog page views and comment come from people I don’t know (like the found my blog through Google search) than people I do know (when people click my facebook link or have my blog bookmarked). And even someone they does know me, they don’t know everything about me, specifically my friends in Tokyo.
If I were to write, ‘when I was out in Shibuya yesterday with Anna, she said “I don’t think I could live in Japan, I’m too big!” Classic Anna! She has a point, though. Living in Tokyo can be…’ in my blog, it would cause a bit of confusion.
People who read my blog don’t know who Anna is [she’s my sister], why she was in Tokyo [she wasn’t, I just made this up], or why she was too big for Japan [anyone who has seen her knows that she is taller – and prettier – than most models]. It’s confusing. Not to mention any of my other friends in Japan named Anna might read it and be like “Hey, when did this happen?”
The only name I have and will ever mention on my blog is my fiancé, Ryosuke. He’s become an intricate part of me; most of my adventures or revelations happen when he’s around. For everyone else… I just say “my friend.”
This is a personal decision for simplicity’s sake.
2. The second reason is a bit more complicated. It involves personal space and privacy.
The thing is, I’ve appeared on 6 people’s blogs throughout the years [excluding family members, roommates, or boyfriends]. All six of the blogs belonged to distant friends; none of them told me they were going to write about me. I found the blogs by accident.
Last year, when I was bored, I put my full name into Google search and was going through the results when there, on page four, was someone’s blog. I clicked on it. It was a two-paragraph description on how awesome I was and how good of friends we were. I was a bit shocked. I guess it’s because I hadn’t talked to this girl in almost a year. When she wrote it, we were good friends. Now…? Not so much. I found two more blogs that mentioned me- both of them had pictures of me they had pulled off of my facebook.
[Quick tip, if you’re going to write about me, please realize that I’m the only person alive with the name “Grace Buchele.” My last name is pretty unique. If you write about me AND mention both my first and last name, I will probably find it].
Don’t get me wrong, I was flattered. All of the content was really nice. They said some great things about me… But I even so, I felt a little bit violated- it was an invasion of privacy. A small invasion, but an invasion nonetheless.
I am not a secretive purpose. I post far too many pictures on facebook and write my opinions on my blog. But the difference is that I’m the one posting it. When people write about me without telling me, even if I’m just mentioned in passing, it feels a little bit like I’m hiding in a bathroom stall, listening to people gossip about me.
Maybe I’m the only person who thinks this way, but on the off-chance that someone else I know feels the same way, I never post names on my blog.
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